Fucked myself

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  • #129475
    Jfox WANTED $4
    Outlaw

    So sat in my front room watching the latest video which I love when Steve posts  a new stream

    so here we go before I begin my story I’d 100% don’t blame any streamer at all I love to watch and and watching don’t tempt me to play slots

     

    im a stone cold stupid fuck when gambling  iv used gamcare but everyone who has used this block probably done the same as me got mates to open accounts or use there accounts that’s already ready to play

     

    over the last year iv spunked 90k online gambling I’m self employed so yeah all my TAX and VAT money is gone I’m a single dad who’s screwed his life right up

     

    9 days no gamble that’s a record for me trying to control gambling as it’s taken over my life that’s all I think about

     

    I actually dream of a max win that’s going to pull me <span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>out the shit hole </span><span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>iv dug for myself </span>

     

    now I realise il never get out to is hole unless I get my shit together 9 days is massive for me

     

    I’m. Nit looking for sympathy I’m here posting this to try and explain how easy it is to get in they place I am now it’s hell and I would no<span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>t wish this in my worst enemy </span>

     

    im Sure a lot of you have spent more than you can at times chasing your loss it’s a horrible place to be in

     

    im Sure there’s a few of you in my situation right now So what iv done is I <span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>v distanced myself from friends who gamble which I think helps me trying to keep </span><span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>busy and take my mind if gambling </span>

     

    <span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>you</span>

    <span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>may all say why watch streamers who gamble il tell you why because I watch the ups and downs and it helps me not gamble </span>

     

    when gambling you all

    know this your mind goes blank bills and spunking money just goes out the window it’s crazy worse than drugs it’s an addiction that grips you nothing else matters seen myself stop work for hours just to play slots

     

    Im a bit fucked up tonight and I think this  rant has helped me

     

    im expecting to be slated and slagged a stupid prick but this is my story it’s ruined my life

     

    and like I stated from the start I don’t blame anyone but myself bandit love your videos followed you for 5 years and when u fucked off for a year we was all worried you was in the place I am now

     

    much love everyone looking forward to the Shit comments that follows this ducked yo

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    #129477
    Xbobmad WANTED $734
    Outlaw

    If you’re in the UK get in touch with the NHS gambling addiction service. There’s always a way out of this and you’ve made the first step by admitting to yourself you’ve got a very serious problem. I’ve provided a link for you with stuff to look through. They won’t judge and are there to help not berate you and make you feel worse.

    https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/addiction-support/gambling-addiction/

    You can beat this, and there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. Please keep in touch and let us know how you’re getting on

    You’ve got this 👊

    #129484
    Seyahkram1977 WANTED $706
    Outlaw

    my man nobody on here will give you shit for telling your story, this place is for the good and the bad, tho we might give you a little shit if you say in 6 months time you’ve done it again, but this is place to talk and get a load off…

    1st thing is just to get your head straight, personally I don’t believe just stopping helps, you need to talk it out with somebody, so get in touch with the docs and ask for a referral…

    If you feel awkward about talking just tell your self “ the awkward part was telling all us on the forum, and you’ve done that now, but the next healthy part is getting help “, nobody gets out of this life with out scars, how deep they go is down to you…

     

    #129512
    Jfox WANTED $4
    Outlaw

    So honestly I was scared to come back on the site embarrassed and scared to look at the comments my heads just fucked doing too many ——- drinking too much can’t find a way out my heads screwed yes I’m a stupid fuck who deserves everything that’s coming my way seriously someone else must be in the same position I’m in now friends are worried

    im not even eating heads so screwed up Its 4.55am got work in a few hours im not looking for sympathy just a relief to get it out there and Steve (bandit) like I said in the original post no one to blame but myself being a proper prick heads spinning 1000000000 miles an hour you people will only understand if you been here had hand in face crying not for me but for my daughter wtf am I doing I don’t even know anymore

     

    bandit ( Steve ) everyone was worried about you when u fucked off and left us for a year but most of us understand why u fucked off

     

    would be nice to put a face to the voice we all l<span style=”font-size: 1rem;”>ove </span>

     

    got a golf course less than 10 seconds from my front door come show me that swing u always brag about tiger got nothing on you mate

     

    down Falmouth Cornwall anyone down this way and understand what the fuck im

    Going through comment and come  put my head right please no one understand but someone in my nightmare Freddy Krueger got nothing on my nightmares

     

     

    1 last thing thank you for the kind words to the few who commented that means the world to me knowing someone actually gives a fuck about my story just a fucking mess this could happen to anyone caught up in the gambling addiction

     

    #129517
    mrsdoyle1968 WANTED $8
    Outlaw

    Hi

    I’ve been gambling since I could reach the slot to put a coin in (so nearly 50 years).  Decided this was the year to do something about it so referred my self to the GameChange Course viaGamCare.  You can self refer so no-one else needs to know, you get a form to fill out online and then you get a quick call to see if you are eligible (you will be).  You then get set up with a GamCare therapist who goes through your story over the phone.  You’ll then get a link to the course itself and on either a weekly or fortnightly basis, your therapist will phone you and go through the latest module of the course.   I’m 6 weeks in and haven’t gambled for 5 weeks now, my therapist a brilliant and I’ve told her stuff that I wouldn’t dream about telling anyone else, even my partner of 25 years!

    Go for it mate, what’s the worst that can happen?    And by the way, I still enjoy watching The Bandit et al, probably more now than when I was losing my money.  Got my first holiday booked for October, haven’t been away for 9 years!!!   Whatever you do, good luck!!!

    #129564
    Seyahkram1977 WANTED $706
    Outlaw

    Mate, just try and draw a line in it now… what’s done is done… and next weeks next month it’ll be different and won’t feel so monumental ….it’ll still sting but it won’t be as raw as today ..

    but use these feelings you have today to tell your self why you need to make a change and to make that change, what ever that is to you…

    like I said, nobody will give you shit on here for telling your story…

    #129617
    Optimus_Faffer WANTED $1
    Outlaw

    Hey man. I know what you are going through, and it sucks.

    If you ever need to talk, I’m in Helston.

    Can’t guarantee I can help, but I can listen. And a lot that you say rings very true to me, especially the losing of reality when playing.

    #133689
    Jfox WANTED $4
    Outlaw

    That’s really nice of you closing in on 50 myself in February working my bollox off atm but yeah sounds good prob better to chat with someone who understand

Viewing 8 posts - 1 through 8 (of 8 total)