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[Eightblack WANTED $446 Outlaw]

So as some of the regulars know from my previous posts I’m a recovering addict of various vices and over the last year or so I’ve been doing fantastically on all fronts but these last few weeks I’ve gone back 15months, not drugs except more pot than usual and a detrimental amount of gambling and drinking. I’ve had my hours cut so moneys been tight and it’s made gambling more attractive as a money maker than a form of entertainment

 

So Today after getting declined for a payday loan I phoned my mum and spouted a load of shit in order to get her to transfer 50quid so I could carry on chasing book of dead after losing everything and then bought a load of beer to drown the feels with the last tenner. I’m sat here now looking at these full cans and empty bank account feeling like an absolute cunt, a horrible lying cunt. addiction is the worst thing in the world

I’m sure some of you can relate to this so there’s no real reason for this post other than to get shit off my shoulders and hopefully show others who suffer with addiction they’re not alone with the forced lies and empty feelings, it’s a hard thing to admit

[Haz40 WANTED $1,167 Outlaw]

Unfortunately we do understand mate as most of us have been there. For once I’m a bit stuck what to say other than i feel for you i really do. I could preach to you about gamstop or gamban but I’m not cos i know that’s your decision and that wont help you today. I don’t know the exact ins and outs of your past only what you’ve put on here and one thing i will say is don’t beat yourself up. You have come along way from your past so you should be proud of that. Good luck and you know were always on here.

[li ligarr WANTED $82 Outlaw]

Done similar things when i was younger,use to make up lies to get money from my mum  or brother just so i could goto the arcade or pub to play slots(before online gambling)..at an older age got myself into big debt from gambling….the terrible thing is with gambling you can go months without touching it,then in 1 session just blow £1000s…its a terrible thing,i would suggest you gamban yourself mate.

[Winningbird WANTED $574 Outlaw]

Most of us have been there, me included, so I know how you’re feeling. Don’t be too hard on your self, its obviously a bad day for you, and fingers crossed that tomorrow will be a better day. Yes, you have an addiction, yes you’ve lied to get money, but you’ll come back from this if you’re willing to fight it. Addiction is an absolute bitch. I’m always here if you want a rant. Feel free to ask seedy for my email address if you want a chat. I did a course on CBT to try and help my addiction.. managed to help others but never my self ?.

[Anonymous WANTED $483 Inactive]

Eightblack dont be so hard on yourself mate. Most of us including myself have been exactly where you are. And probably lately too. So Pick that double chin up and crack on my son. We both know this will all be in the past and forgotten. I know its hard in the moment to disregard whats just happened. But in the end ya have too mate.

Onwards and upwards R kid.

#YouStrongBro ?

[Bo Bob ballsdeep WANTED $15 Outlaw]

Due to start work at 10 this morning, I’m £380 down in the bookies at 955 and ring in with a lie about being sick, I’m home by 10:16am and on Betfair £250 deposited and a £165 spin on roulette. . . Won 330, repeat won 510, repeat again balance is at 845, cashed out 800 I’m somehow 170 up for the day but feeling like a cunt knowing it won’t be the last time and its just a lucky escape, wish I could say I won’t do it again but I know I will. Good luck fella your not alone.

[Winningbird WANTED $574 Outlaw]

Bob, same advice to you. If you feel you can’t control it have you considered self excluding or gamstop? I know it’s probably one of the hardest things to do but it helps a lot. It will help future things like this happening. 🙂

[ImperialDragon WANTED $70 Outlaw]

I’ve only ever been that £50 guy, but my £50 is someone else’s £500 so it’s all relative.  I had to do what some of the others here advised which was to bar myself from the local arcades because the slots RTP have been ripped a new one.  I don’t know why because Theresa May was only meant to be targeting the bookies table games (roulette etc) but for some reason it affected the arcade machines too so I just had to stop.

Online gambling’s not so bad for me.  Again it’s £50 per month self-imposed limit.  Plus, I’m not tempted to increase that limit as it’s been set to £50 for 18 months now.

[Green2711 WANTED $492 Outlaw]

I can relate more than most as my gambling addiction has been spiralling out of control lately, literally got paid on the 15th and had around £500 spare after paying bills and I’ve blown through the lot in less than a week, had a slight recovery on Venture which I proceeded to go through (£320) the same day I received it. Ive also been smoking weed like its going out of fashion. So now I’m broke till next month but I’ve got my bills paid and food in the cupboard just nothing left for having fun with. But that’s my doing I can deal with that.

I went through a bad break up over a year ago and that’s when things started to get out of control the more I think about it the more I try to numb myself with marijuana and booze and then almost like I’m trying to punish myself ill go and blow a wad on gambling. Its got to the point now where I’ve alienated myself from my all my friends and  sadly gambling has become my life, when I don’t have money I’m constantly checking for free spins and getting agitated knowing I can’t gamble till next pay day. I’ve also borrowed money off my folks and my brother giving some bullshit reason so I can have another flutter which makes me feel like an utter cunt and then means I have less next month so the cycle of borrowing and paying back continues… I always pay them back mind you but that’s besides the point.

On top of that after the break up last year I was at my actual worst: in a state of deep depression and not caring about life I took out 6k worth of payday  loans and I still haven’t paid them back yet. I’m not in the best place at the moment and really don’t care what happens to me so Ive stopped my DMP plan months ago and have been ignoring the loan companies ever since.

I know the best thing for me is to sign up to gamban but it’s so hard given that my life has been nothing but gambling for the past year. When I’m feeling low its like the rush from a gamble is the only thing that brings me excitement and a bit of joy anymore and I realise how pathetic that sounds.

But I’ve had an addictive personality since I was young it’s always been one thing or another but nothing has come close to the grip gambling has over me.

I hope you manage to conquer your demons and stay strong, brother. I probably wouldn’t have posted this if you hadn’t opened up in this post.

[Haz40 WANTED $1,167 Outlaw]

Green2711 wrote:

I can relate more than most as my gambling addiction has been spiralling out of control lately, literally got paid on the 15th and had around £500 spare after paying bills and I’ve blown through the lot in less than a week, had a slight recovery on Venture which I proceeded to go through (£320) the same day I received it. Ive also been smoking weed like its going out of fashion. So now I’m broke till next month but I’ve got my bills paid and food in the cupboard just nothing left for having fun with. But that’s my doing I can deal with that.

I went through a bad break up over a year ago and that’s when things started to get out of control the more I think about it the more I try to numb myself with marijuana and booze and then almost like I’m trying to punish myself ill go and blow a wad on gambling. Its got to the point now where I’ve alienated myself from my all my friends and  sadly gambling has become my life, when I don’t have money I’m constantly checking for free spins and getting agitated knowing I can’t gamble till next pay day. I’ve also borrowed money off my folks and my brother giving some bullshit reason so I can have another flutter which makes me feel like an utter cunt and then means I have less next month so the cycle of borrowing and paying back continues… I always pay them back mind you but that’s besides the point.

On top of that after the break up last year I was at my actual worst: in a state of deep depression and not caring about life I took out 6k worth of payday  loans and I still haven’t paid them back yet. I’m not in the best place at the moment and really don’t care what happens to me so Ive stopped my DMP plan months ago and have been ignoring the loan companies ever since.

I know the best thing for me is to sign up to gamban but it’s so hard given that my life has been nothing but gambling for the past year. When I’m feeling low its like the rush from a gamble is the only thing that brings me excitement and a bit of joy anymore and I realise how pathetic that sounds.

But I’ve had an addictive personality since I was young it’s always been one thing or another but nothing has come close to the grip gambling has over me.

I hope you manage to conquer your demons and stay strong, brother. I probably wouldn’t have posted this if you hadn’t opened up in this post.

Shit mate you’ve got some balls putting that up. Fair play to you. It’s certainly not pathetic to mention the buzz of gambling. It’s what we live for sometimes. I will say this though gamstop was the best thing i ever did. It took me literally 60 seconds to do it. It’s the relief more than anything. You’d be amazed once the opportunity is taken away the urge decreases massively. You’d think you would go mad not been able to play. It’s not true. I won’t say it’s easy straight away but in no time you don’t even think about it. I came off gamstop and within a week I’m back on it for a year this time. I don’t miss them. Just try and remember what you did when you were single and didn’t play slots. When you get paid instead of playing online get your mates rang up and get yourself out. Good  luck with whatever you decide to do. We’re always here ?

[Eightblack WANTED $446 Outlaw]

Cheers guys this is why I love this place, it does make me feel like such a cunt and I was doing really well to drink and gamble within reason it’s nice to know I’m not alone.. there’s some real solid advice and real words of kindness here x

Green man that second paragraph is the same for me, like exactly the same

[Biohazard WANTED $675 Outlaw]

Sorry to hear what you’re going through Eightblack. As I’m sure you’re aware, and certainly gathered from this thread, that you’re not alone! Most of us have been in that position at one time or another, many still there now.

Gambling is great when it’s good, and disgustingly awful when it’s bad. Unfortunately, the latter is the most common outcome by a mile.

Don’t beat yourself up too much about the borrowing and all of that, you know it was wrong, but the bug took over and that’s just the way it went. What’s done is done, rather than punish yourself, look to learn from it.

I hope you manage to get past this bud, there’s a road ahead, but it’s certainly doable. We’re always here to chat! 🙂

[KeepTheCoffeeOn WANTED $6 Outlaw]

Well I’ve just done my balls in, £2k down and there goes my paycheque. Was on Gamstop but my period ended and it’s a hassle to sign back up.

Now I have no food or money to live on till next payday June 21st ? hating life right about now, don’t know why I do this shit to myself. Don’t suppose anyone wants to buy an I7 gaming pc lol, need to sell it to eat this month ? FML!

[Winningbird WANTED $574 Outlaw]

It must be one of those days.. I’ve blown my wage too ?. I told you, I can give advice but I can never take my own advice ?

I’m upset with my self, but nothing can be done now. Live and not learn more than likely ?. Going to have a break from the slots after tonight and wait for a massive bollocking from other half tomorrow when I tell him I need money. He’s already got the face on with me and tried to kick me out 2 times this week. Men pffft ??

Glad I have you lot here to vent to

[Winningbird WANTED $574 Outlaw]

Been up since  2am now and resorted to eating as much chocolate as I can, while I try to think of an excuse why I gambled it all when I could have done with it today of all days because now my daughter is off for a week for the holidays. I have to laugh or I’ll cry so excuse the use of these laughing emoji things. It makes me feel better.

Anyone considering gambling today who knows they have a problem, struggles to admit they have a problem, or just cant control the spending, please stay away from gambling today. I have a feeling it’s going to be a hard day for us.

 

 

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